In Which I Go To Writer’s Group 1.13.2014

Write a title of a book you’re thinking of writing/that popped into your head and write a synopsis

 

Oh Shit

 

Madyson’s life never seems to go right, and every time it doesn’t she says, oh shit. First she fails all her classes and has to retake the 9th grade, then she fails a pregnancy test, a drug test, and a math test all in the same day. Just when she thinks her life can’t get any worse, it does! Read all about how horrible Madyson’s life is and at the end of the book you can say thank Deity I’m not her!

 

Write an epic urban saga in 5 minutes: The dividing lines of the warring breakfast gangs

(feel free to embellish with people on the group)

 

The Oatmeal Outlaws girded up their loins to go to war with Team Toast. They grabbed their oatmeal guns and slathered butter on their knives made of hardened oatmeal. Meanwhile, Team Toast loaded butter into their butter guns and their knives were made out of really stale bread.

I hate reading fight scenes in books. I usually skip over them. So I’m going to skip over the huge fight scene now, but it was really long and it took up like, 5 pages. It ended when The Cereal Killers swooped in and started blasting Krave, Captain Crunch, and Sugar Pops at the 2 gangs, taking them by surprise and killing them all immediately. The Cereal Killers were victorious and went out for a meal of cereal and beer.

The next day, they prepared to ambush the Granny Granolas.

 

 

Justify the thought process of a Disney Villain –why what they did was absolutely correct (you can pick a non disney villain if you have to.)

 

The hunter aimed the gun. His stomach growled. He cursed inwardly. He’d never catcha nything if the whole forest could hear him. He thought of his wife and children back at home, boiling potatoes and gathering wild greens. It was just last week that he’d had to come home and tell his wife and small daughter that he’d lost his job due to the tough economy. “That’s ok daddy,” his daughter said, “I have another one you can have. I bought it at the store and I put it in a bag.” The Hunter smiled inwardly at his 4 year old’s misunderstanding of how the world worked. If his daughter lost something, it was no big deal because daddy bought her a new one. The Hunter wished some big sky daddy would buy him a job. Some said God existed, he didn’t know.

A dear wandered into his sights. The dear had a faun with her. The Hunter hesitated. He didn’t want to kill some poor animal’s mother, and he didn’t want to have to kill a baby dear. He thought of his wife, pregant with their son. He thought of his daughter, who was hopefully not pregnant as well. His stomach growled. The doe’s ears perked up.

The hunter took aim, fired, and killed Bambi’s mother.

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